Is there something remiss about me? I am begining to observe strange changes among my neuro whatsits! This morning was supposed to be a light “Hack” across some rather nice country, prior to our yearly sojourn in the Cheviot Hills. Here is how the day went!
I arose early, dressed, and while shaving, noticed my shirt was on, inside out! Of course while grumbling to myself, about the shirt, I failed to avoid the small mole that exists on my throat! Yes, the “twin bladed” razor cut neatly through the darkened flesh, leaving a small, but ever growing pool of dramatically red blood in the bathroom sink! Not to be outdone by this small, but cataclysmic event, I reached for the towel to stem the loss of my lifeblood, failing to note that the towel wasnt any such thing!
My wife`s rather nice wrap, was now red, instead of Ivory! I decided that flight in this case was to be the better part of Valour!
As I loaded the horse, and drove to collect my good friend, my right hand steered the car, while the left tried intermittently to staunch the continuous flow of vital fluids. Fortunately my friend is a Hospital Nurse. Several sticky plasters later, and with hope ever eternal we travelled to our Trail ground. I had almost given up on the day, it was again raining, not too heavily but enough to cause worry. Mainly due to the car park being under several inches of the wet stuff! Now! I`m not put off so easily, no! Saddled and ready to go, (and without mishap, dear reader!) We headed out into the wild yonder!
We climbed ever higher, the trail meandering left then right, wending its way through lush Pine trees, things were going well, that is until we saw a small tree floating past! Quickly followed by another! “Lets take this other trail” I suggested. But this was no better, as we struggled along the now submerged track, dodging floating debris, we finally headed home.
As we crossed the local stream, now masquerading as a full blown cousin of the Mississippi, I couldnt help but notice that the somewhat rickety bridge had ceased to exist! Gone! “Ah well!” I cried, to no one in particular, as my friend had settled down into her saddle, and looked more like a Gnome than anything else. I ploughed forward into the maelstrom of foam and crashing water! We were thrown hither and thither, tossed about like a cork on the sea. My friend, bless her cotton socks was in hot pursuit, I could just make out her head above the seething water! We at last made land. As we scrambled out of the river, dripping and soaked to the skin! My boots were full! I tried to dismount with some elegance but ended up in a crumpled mess in the mud! Removing one boot, I allowed the two Trout and the Shark to fall out and flap about, before scooping them back into the river! My friend stayed on her horse, a calmly aggressive look on her face! Back at the trailer?
“ Shall we get saddled up then?” My friend asked, “ You dozed off!